diary

Happy 2025 mo’fuggas!

03/01/25 12:13

I had written a number of blog posts after the last but I’ve decided to start anew; the ‘fiasco’ factor was dialled up to 10,000 which works great for cathartically purging my nonsensical thoughts but doesn’t make for good reading. Now, to segue onto this year’s resolutions which I’ve firmly avoided till now:

1 - Health

2 - Finances

3 - Creativity

“My golly gosh!” you say, “3 vague words with no specificity?”. Glad you noticed. If you’re a big all-or-nothing dreamer like me, each year you create detailed S.M.A.R.T objectives in efforts to reach some goal. Let’s run 5 times a week, do yoga every morning and eat max 1.8K calories a day to achieve a 75kg bodyweight by July. Great - except for when it inevitably falters.

The guilt from not following a stipulation - e.g. only running once in a given week and overeating 3 days in a row - becomes all-encompassing leading to numbing activities, until you’ve regressed back to the status quo. The stakes are too high. You’re going from 0 to 100 without building up the momentum. And what if your idealised 100 doesn’t even contribute to a life that works for you? I’ve kept it vague so that these overarching ‘themes’ can help guide me in my decisions every day, and so I can build up momentum following my intuition every step of the way. In the end, my 100 could be completely different exercises and dietary conditions, in a much more flexible schedule which aims to. enhance not overwhelm.

Only time will tell how this new approach works. For now, we have some work to do. Ciao.

The Diary of a FIASCO

03/11/24 21:18

And so the website draws closer to its fruition. About a month ago I purchased the ‘Cup Noods’ domain, with very little progress since - however I’ve partly enjoyed the bi-weekly tradition of swapping the positions of logos and text. I have a busy couple months ahead but we’ll aim to launch in the New Year.

Writing here feels somewhat peculiar in contrast to physical journalling. I know traffic to this sub-domain won’t be breaking any records, but the fact it is out there feels validating, empowering; it’s ticking all the la-di-da self-expression/creativity boxes. Yes, it does make me polish my sentences but what’s wrong with letting it all out palatably, if not for me? I am not a good writer - in fact I’m incredibly slow and find myself constantly googling synonyms - but I enjoy the process and wish to grow the oh-so withered muscle.

I’ve called this blog/journal/diary subdomain ‘The Diary of a FIASCO’. If acquainted with podcasts or motivational tiktoks you may know Steve Bartlett’s show of a similar rhyming name, “The Diary of a CEO”. Indeed my parodying title is indicative of some antitheses:

1 - I’m a freelancer, ex-corporate with no employees,

2 - I’m neuro-spicy; chaos runs parallel with my creativity,

3 - I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing!

However as one may gather, I am slightly self-aware. I’m equally not blind to my achievements thus far, and I do possess qualities which will take me far in this fleeting life (willingness to learn new things, always strives for excellence..). I’ve come to accept my cognitive shortcomings and I cannot be arsed hiding it - equally it’s time to capitalise on my strengths. My life has been an untamed chaos - but perhaps here in this sombre subdomain I can gain a speck of control and piece together a narrative to reflect on. I’ll become CEO of my own FIASCO. Heh.